Wow, we got an update!

We received an unexpected but very welcome surprise yesterday - Emerson's 8 month progress update!!

Some of the highlights:

• She has two bottom teeth.
• She is starting to eat solids now, such as rice porridge, strawberries and bread.
• She is using furniture to help her walk.
• She is imitating speech sounds.
• She likes to play peek-a-boo.

The report mentioned that she's a "mama's girl" and is shy around strangers. And then it ended with "she is a happy, smart, and pretty girl."

The update was like a burst of sunshine on to the dark, cloudy day we were having yesterday. Although I had tears like rain just streaming down my face as I read it. The update gave us the chance to take a peek into her life right now. I could almost see her in front of me waddling around her home, and happily chewing on strawberries. It made me so happy but yet made me realize that it was possible to even miss her more than I have been!

I am so thankful to the agency in Korea for sending over the report and giving us the chance to connect to our daughter. I am overjoyed that she is able to be a "mama's girl" with her foster mom. What a loving heart our baby has! I'm also so thankful for how wonderful and loving her foster mommy is with her. But to honest, I felt sad at the same time, thinking about the pain we may cause her little heart when we come to take her away from the only mama she knows. I prayed last night that God start preparing her heart to love us and that there will be room in there to love all of us from the very first moment we all come together.

Thank you Lord for watching over Emerson. She is just thriving and growing so wonderfully, and we know that it is all You. It's so hard to be apart from her and feel like we can't be there to raise her, but I'm reminded that she is your child too. Thank you for blessing all of us by placing her in such a loving foster home. Please bless her foster mommy and family for loving our little girl so much.

8 Months Old

Today our Emerson turns 8 months old.

According to baby development charts, this month she will be crawling and using furniture to try and stand. All such big milestones! I can only imagine what she looks and sounds like as discovers these firsts.

Emerson, I pray you are happy today as you turn 8 months old. Hopefully within the next 8 months of your life, we will come together to become the family God always intended for us to be. I pray you are healthy, eating lots, smiling and laughing a lot, and are ready to start crawling and walking soon. Even though daddy and I can't be there to see you reach these wonderful milestones, we see you every day in our dreams. Start practicing on that walking, because when you're home, we'll be playing lots of hide-and-go-seek and tag games so you're going to have to walk pretty fast.

Happy 8 months, my beautiful baby girl.

Remember my dreams

I'm one of those people that never remember dreams. In fact, I didn't think dreams come to me anymore, at least not the ones that I can clearly remember. However, this past week was different.

I had 2 dreams that was very clear because both of them were about Emerson.



The first was about how Emerson was healthy and was in good care through her foster mom. :)

Then, the next day, I had a dream that she was coming home within days, so we were frantically getting ready for her arrival.

I don't really know if there's any meaning behind these dreams, but I woke up after one of them and just laid in bed with tears in my eyes. I miss her, and I wonder if God's been preparing my heart of being a daddy? I think so...



I hope that Emerson will have an opportunity to read this journal some day. Just want to tell her that I am thinking about her right now. Though you were not born from our womb, you were born from our hearts. God had planned us to be a forever family long before we knew it.

Gene

Yes

We were having lunch with my grandma yesterday and as I was showing her a picture of Em on my phone our waitress came by and asked, "Ohh, is that your daughter?"

"Yes," I replied, then smiled - inside and out. That was the first time anyone ever asked me that, and it felt so wonderful to say yes. There was no need to explain how she's being adopted, etc., etc.. She is our daughter.

This journey is going to have its crazy ups and downs, but at the end of the day all that matters is that she is our daughter.

Prayer Request

Please pray for us and baby E that we will be able to bring her home this year.

I've been doing a lot of frantic researching this week and from what I've read, it appears there's a chance we may not be able to bring Em home until next year. Korea has been planning on ending their overseas adoption program by 2012 and every year has set a quota on how many Emigration Permissions (EP's) they release. EP's are necessary for the children to obtain their visas and passports so they can come home to their forever families here in the States. I read that Korea has been decreasing the quota by 10% every year.

In 2009, the quota was met by July. Meaning anyone who submitted their acceptance papers after that, had to wait until 2010 to have an EP processed. Because there was a backlog from the previous year, in 2010 the quota was met by April. That means an even bigger backlog for this year! That's why families who submitted in June are just getting their EP's and travel calls now. We are so nervous because our papers went to Korea last month. I read on an adoption forum yesterday that a woman who submitted last December was nervous that she wouldn't get her EP processed this year. If that's the case, then we certainly won't either!

I get sad and stressed when I think about this, and have had trouble sleeping all this week as the possibility of us not being able to bring home Em this year weighs heavily on my heart. But at the same time I know our God can do ANYTHING and His timing is infinitely perfect and I have to trust in that. Would you please join us in prayer that He will let us bring Emerson home this year?

We should get an answer sometime in the next month or two as to when the EP quota for this year has been met. If the answer at that time is "Not this year", then we will trust in God's timing for us. But until then, please, please pray for us. Thank you so much.

Jesus replied, "What is impossible with man is possible with God."

Luke 18:27

I have looked at this picture a thousand times. It seems I always find something new whenever I look at it. Her curled toes, her clenched fists, her 80's hair. The fact that she's wearing long underwear or leggings under her pants (thank you, foster mom, for keeping her warm). I've smiled or laughed out loud so many times while looking at this picture.

But the other day I noticed that her eyes look like she had been crying. And that made me sad. That she cried that day. That all the other times she's cried that I couldn't be there to hold and comfort her, and tell her it's okay. To not be afraid. To give her a big hug and say "Good job!" and let her know that she was so brave for sitting in that chair. To stroke her hair away from her face and let her know her mommy loves her.

I have so many kisses and hugs to make up for. I simply cannot wait.