Helmet Head





I can't believe next week will mark one year together as a family.  Time has truly flown by.  There have been so many precious moments, milestones, and many heartwarming and even heartbreaking moments in this past year.

 

One light-hearted milestone is E wore her helmet today willingly and went out riding her skateboard with a handle. (I still can't remember what this thing is called. She asked me earlier while riding it and I answered "uh, scooter."  Big mistake since she has an amazing memory and will call me out on it when I tell her it's something else). 

Anyway the first time I put that helmet on her, it was really tight and she hated it.  Because of previously mentioned long term memory, she has wanted nothing to do it for a while.  We couldn't let her ride her doohookie because of her self-imposed ban on helmets.

 

Fast forward to today and I asked if she wanted to wear her helmet and go out riding her "scooter," fully expecting her to answer no, when she gave me an enthusiastic yes!  So out we went and here are a few pics of scootin' around town, enjoying today's beautiful sunny weather.

 

 

 

Wishing Well

Today is Emerson's mini-birthday!  My little girl is already 27 months old! 

We spent part of the day at the Mission San Juan Capistrano.  I was able to get a lot of nice pictures of her there.  I never knew how difficult it was to get a good picture of an active toddler.  I would say if you could get one out of 10 in which she's not blinking, putting her hand somewhere on her face, turning her head, etc.... then that's pretty good!

Anyway, one of my favorite shots today was when came across a fountain at the Mission.  I showed Emerson last week how to throw pennies into the fountain at the mall, so today she asked me for a penny.  She doesn't know how to make wishes yet so I made them for her.  She threw in three pennies so my three wishes for her are:

That we are doing all we can and more to let her know she is unconditionally loved and safe right now, and to assure her that we are indeed her forever family.

That her precious little heart is healing from all that she's gone through, and that we can understand and tend to the heartache and pain that she doesn't express.

That our little girl will always, always know in her heart just how much she's loved!

Sleeping Milestone

Wow.  Tonight we have a first. 

I've been co-sleeping with Em ever since she came home.  During the first few days/weeks of her transition, she grieved the most at night.  She never outwardly cried during the day, but did so in her sleep.  (Just typing this breaks my heart).  During those times, if she were upset enough to wake up and if I weren't next to her, she'd get really upset. 

She was always very insistent that we sleep together.  So from day 1, I would lay down with her at bedtime and would usually fall asleep with her, then wake up for a few hours and become a night owl to catch up on stuff.  There were a few nights when I wasn't home to put her to sleep but then she'd ask daddy to sleep with her.

However, tonight she was tossing and turning a bit so I got up and said "Mommy has to go do something.  I will come up when I'm done and sleep with you, but I have to go downstairs."  For the first time, she did not protest or cry, and instead responded "Mommy is going to go downstairs, and Emerson will lay down and go to sleep?"  (but in Korean, of course). 

"Yes," I said.  "I'll be back."

Em: "Okay."

Me: "Good night."

Em: "Night!"

Me: "I love you!"

Em: "Love!"

Then I walked out and shut the door behind me.

I could not believe it.  This is the first night she fell asleep alone - willingly!  What a huge step forward!  I think that shows just how secure she feels with us now.  She knows I'll be back, and that I'll always be there in the morning. I'm overjoyed thinking about that.

However, if I'm to be completely honest - I'm teeny tiny sad thinking of how fast she's growing up.  Whereas before it was a HUGE adjustment trying to cosleep with her, now I'm loving it. I know that sounds super selfish but I'm just keeping it real.  We're finally hitting our stride as a family, and I love how at night when I'm settling in next to her, I get to see her sweet little sleeping face and just count all my blessings. I hope tonight doesn't mean the end of our cosleeping is coming soon!

But for tonight, I'll just focus on how amazing and extraordinary it is that she can securely go to sleep without having me physically there.  Three months ago, there was no way I could've ever imagined this day would come.  Just shows how I need to appreciate every single moment with our sunshine. Even the challenging ones since those end up passing and becoming a memory.  A memory in our family history.

Silent Bless You

Today Emerson sneezed while Gene and I were talking so we didn't say "Bless you" to her.

Emerson: "Ahchooo!"

Gene & Anya: silent

Emerson: (beat) "Thank you."

Gene & Anya: (laughter).

Not sure if that was Miss Sassy Pants or Miss Sarcastic.  Time will tell, but either way that girl cracks me up!

Name

We called Emerson by her Korean name for the first month or so after coming home.  We then added Emerson in front of her Korean name, and just recently started calling her Emerson only. She's been responding well to Emerson, but never actually said her own name (either in Korean or English) in reference to herself.

However, recently she started pointing out things like "That's our car," or "That's mommy's brush," etc..  This past week we were playing with her dolls and she told one of them that something was "Emerson gguh."  And tonight when I was carrying her out from her bath, she got a glimpse of the two of us in the mirror and said "Mommy rrang ('and' in Korean) Emerson"!

Now that she knows she's Emerson, we plan on calling her by both her names.  We don't want her to lose her Korean name.

Emerson rrang Mommy at the beach a couple weeks ago.

Day at the Farm

Today we visited a local farm with Em's favorite playdate friend Jonah and his family.  We all signed up for a tractor ride tour.  It was a super hot day even at 10 o'clock in the morning!) and bought a straw hat for Em at the farm.

 



Sitting next to Jonah on the tractor ride.

 

Taking off for our tour!

Jonah & mommy!

 

 

We sampled different veggies and fruits during the tour. Em is not fond of veggies so she mostly played with them instead of eating them.

Taking a break from the tractor ride to walk through a watermelon patch.

Looking for watermelons with Daddy.

Daddy and Em in front of the tractor carts.

Em couldn't wait to take off her straw hat!

 

 

 

Sunset in Korea

I took this picture in Korea the evening before we took custody of Emerson.  We were walking with Gene's cousins through a trendy, cute part of town that was a mix of old and new shops and restaurants. There were narrow cobblestone streets and lots of alley ways and side streets.  Every so often, we would find ourselves with a clear view of the city or of a mountainside.  I turned to see the sun shining brightly as it was starting to set.  It immediately made me think of Emerson and the last night she was spending with her foster family.  Remembering that moment brings tears to my eyes tonight. 

...10!

Tonight at bedtime, Em counted to 10 by herself, and in English!  For the past week or so I've been counting 1 through 10 with her, and she'd repeat the numbers after me but it was only one at a time.  So tonight I was so surprised to hear her do it by herself. It's so cute when she says "sehben"! I'm just so proud of our little girl!

Coincidentally, this week marks 10 weeks that we've been together as a family!  I've lost a sense of time since being home with her, so I can't really say if it feels longer or shorter than two and a half months.  Much of that time has been spent getting to know who she is, and adjusting to our life as a family of three.  I know she has gone through so much in that time and I am amazed at her strength and resilience.

Time will tell where she is now with her grieving and adjustment, but lately she's been reacting adversely towards certain people more strongly.  She's always been vocal about not wanting to say hi to someone or having anything to do with them, but lately she's started to cry if they start talking to her.  The worst reactions were both at restaurants and with random people (strangers) coming by and talking directly to her.  Both times she was in a high chair and immediately started crying and wanted me to hold her.

Other than that, with each passing week I see how much more comfortable she's getting with us as a family.  There are lots of laughs and recently, kisses!  She's also going through a major growing spurt. She's grown almost two inches since coming home.  She's starting to become a picky eater, though.  FM told us she eats everything well but she definitely doesn't like her veggies, and isn't particularly fond of meat.  Although she LOVES fruit and dairy!

We also recently stopped giving her the bottle at bed time.  She's been a trooper and only asked for it a couple times since we said no more bottle.  It's taking her a bit longer to fall asleep but otherwise, she's been doing well without it.

I still catch myself in wonderment at times that she's actually home with us and that I'm able to discover all these things about her!

She loves making this face! I've even caught her practicing it in front of a mirror, lol.

I recently taught her the Korean "V" sign for pictures. Her version is more of a "W"!